Carlisle and Esme The first years
by Carlisle-Potter-Sherlockfan
Summary: The story of how Esme learns how to adapt to the her vampire life and how she and Carlisle fall in love. Without Edward.
1. The first time we meet

It had been hour when I jumped of that cliff. I still had my eyes closed but could hear a voice softly apologizing. What was he apologizing for I thought, was I dead, I probably was I jumped off a cliff in a storm I thought by myself. I opened my eyes slowly. The room was dark but I could see everything so clearly. Every fiber and little detail. Then I spotted a person sitting next to me on a chair holding my hand. He looked at me with a mix of emotions on his face, I could see worry, shame, a little bit of fear and relief. He had stopped whispering when I had opened my eyes. Where am I was the first thing that came to my mind and at the same moment I heard a strange high voice asking it, it took me a while until I realized that it was my own voice. The man must have seen the confused expression on my face as a little smile moved the corner of his mouth. Am I dead, is this heaven. No you're not dead he spoke with a light voice I have changed you. Changed I asked what do you mean I wanted to sit up and before I had finished the thought in my head I was already sitting. I need to begin by the beginning he started. I now looked curiously looked at his beautiful face, he had light blond hair and these amazing amber colored eyes. I found you when you're where wheeled into the morgue, you were so beaten up and bloody that they hadn't even looked for a pulse, but I heard it and decided I couldn't let you die he sighed. I took you to my home and I bit you his fingers lifted of my hand and he gently stroked over the mark that now was placed on my neck. What does that mean I asked trying to get everything in order in my head but I couldn't it was like my mind went all over the place. You are now a vampire he said not meeting my eye but staring at his hands resting in his lap. I am a what I stuttered that can't be and before I knew it I was across the room. How did I? You are a vampire now he explained you are much faster and stronger than a human would ever be. My name is he started but time I cut off his sentence I know who you are I blurted out you are the doctor who treated me for a broken leg ten years ago. He looked bewildered by this statement you remember he asked. Of course I remember, it is hard to forget a face like yours and I quickly hid my face a bit ashamed of what I just had said you are Dr Cullen. Carlisle he said when he slowly rose to his feet I indeed treated you for a broken leg all those years ago. He came closer why do you still remember me he asked with slight amusement or was it pride. Ever since you treated me your face came wondering in my dreams, I always wondered what had become of you, if your where happy with you wife and children again I turned away with embarrassment apparently everything that popped in my head I said out loud sorry I am not really in control of my mind and speech right now. He looked up at me with a look of understanding I know he said it's because you are a newborn you senses are multiplied by hundreds and it is overwhelming, you will get used to all of it but you will have to learn how to control yourself. I looked into his beautiful eyes. Now it is time to address another problem tough and he took my hand you probably need to hunt, you need blood. This was the first time I felt the burning sensation in my throat and without realizing it my hand grabbed one of the doorposts, immediately I heard a crunching noise and felt the splinters of the wood sliding across my fingers. I looked at it with bewilderment. You will have to get used to your new strength it will probably take some time and you will break more than you would wish but it will happen he said he calmly took my hand and pried my fist open until the remainder of the wooden frame fell to the floor. It was the first time I had looked around me in the room, all I had seen was the beautiful Carlisle sitting beside the bed I had laid on. The details were amazing I could see every fiber of the room every little crack or particle. The room was nicely furnished. A bed stood in the middle of the room and a closed stood beside it filled with clothes. In the back against a window that looked out over the woods behind the house stood a red couch with a table in front of it. Carlisle had stood silently beside me when I had taken in the room looking with slight amazement at my face but then he gingerly pulled my hand making me focus back in him again. You will need to hunt he said softly. Again I felt the burning in the back of my throat and I realized he was right. I followed him through the house apparently there were three floors, we walked down a flight of stairs into a hall though the front door. Out in the forest surrounding the house Carlisle started running with a tuck on my hand and I followed. We were going faster than I could have possibly imaged. We flew across threes, bushes over a river until we stopped. I wanted to keep running it was a wonderful feeling of freedom. But Carlisle made me focus again. Focus Esme he said it was the first time he had spoken my name and I was surprised he still remembered it in fact I forgot the burning sensation in my throat as I looked up at him how do you still remember my name? He looked surprised I rarely forget things he answered I sometimes thought of you he said how you were doing, what happened to you. You did I said I was bewildered how could the man who had been in my dreams all these years be the one who had saved my life. Why did you actually safe me I looked up again he looked puzzled. I couldn't let you die he answered truthfully with a flash of regret on his face. Do you regret it I instantly asked walking away looking around me, we were standing underneath a big pine three in the shade it must be in the afternoon judging by the sun, I keep seeing a sort of regret in your eyes. I heard him sight it's not that I regret saving your life he said but I hate doing what I did to you, I took away your life of better said your death. You saved my life I stated so why should I resent you for it again I looked into his eyes and even from a slight distance I had to remember not to let myself drown in them. I made you a vampire he said you will stay like this for ever, you can't contact your family and you will have to live in the darkness it is a curse in many ways. I have said goodbye to my family long ago I said and I felt a burning sensation in my stomach that had nothing to do with the burning in my throat, like my body wanted to cry but couldn't. he walked over to me and took my hand again Esme I must wonder how are you keeping your senses so under control. What do you mean I asked we were running an it felt so good I actually wanted to keep going but you stopped and I got curious when you remembered me is that wrong I asked looking worried there must be something wrong with me I thought even when I am no longer human it was Carlisle hand that got me back in the present he chuckled. There is nothing wrong with you I am just amazed by your control, normally when a new vampire is created their emotions and behavior is all over the place they are driven by their longing for blood, but here you are standing beside me when a group of deer is walking a couple of miles to the west he said with amazement in his voice I just never met a newborn with such control he gave a pinch in my hand. I still looked a bit puzzled but now the thirst was becoming worse now I noticed fresh blood so near me, I swallowed but it didn't help. He nodded understandingly and we took off again. When we came closer I released Carlisle's hand I heart the pulsating of a heart it was close, my strides were getting longer but I was as silent, after a minute a pounced and felt a pair of antlers rip the dress that I was wearing but I didn't care I didn't take me much strength to take down the deer and my hands went through the fur and then I felt what I was looking for the pulsing of a heart and without hesitation I sank my teeth into its neck. Immediately a felt the burning subside as the blood went through my throat. It felt wonderful but as soon as I had killed the deer it was quickly out of blood but now I noticed Carlisle standing not far away from me with another deer in his hands. Here he said it didn't take long before I drained my second deer. Now I came to my senses again and looked at my hands, my skin color was lighter than it had been, even now it was covered in blood. I crossed my legs underneath my body and looked up to Carlisle how did I just do that I am not that strong I said. Yes you are he nodded while he tossed the deer into a hole he had just dug. I stood up and looked at him his clothes were still unscathed while mine were hanging loosely of my body exposing more than I had realized but for a stupid reason it didn't care anymore I didn't have to be decent the only two people standing in the clearing were Carlisle and me. The cold didn't bother me either I felt the wind blow across my arms but it was like the temperature didn't affect me anymore. You won't be cold anymore Carlisle answered my unspoken question as I had rubbed my hand over my now cold skin as if I wanted to warm myself our kind is hardly affected by anything he had closed the hole and slowly walked over to me and handed the sweater he was wearing here you have ripped your dress, careful though with your strength you may rip it. I carefully took it and pulled it over my head as if it was made of the thinnest fabric. I managed to pull it over my head with making just one hole in the fabric. And when I met Carlisle eye again he had the same look of amazement on his face as before you already have so much control over yourself he murmured. I smiled pleased of hearing the approval in his voice. He stretched his hand out to help me up and I took it without hesitation. We should be going back to the house if you want you want to clean up though he said looking over the torn pieces of clothing that were laying across the clearing we stood in. I shrugged it off, I rather hear more about your live if that is ok with you I said not meeting his eyes when we started to move again this time walking. He nodded what is it what you wanted to know he said while we turned left walking down a little stream running across the forest. Where were you born I asked. London I lived there with my father a pastor, my mother died during childbirth. I squeezed his hand with compassion, he went on, my father was sort of a witch hunter and I was his only son, I helped him but he was an impulsive man seeing ghosts everywhere his eyes lost in time seeing things I couldn't see. He expected me to help him, but when I didn't see the things he saw he got angry with me. But after a while I found a group of vampires that were living in the sewers and I took a mob to destroy them at night trying to draw them out, they were probably hungry so the scent of the blood alone was enough to draw them out and one bit me but he didn't kill me. Knowing that my father would kill everything that the vampires had touched I crawled into a shed and lay there for three days in complete silence he tensed up a bit and trying to help him calm again I rubbed my thumb across his hand he went on and I listened in awe. I quickly realized what I had become and tried to kill myself a small smile came over his face of course I didn't succeed at this, I decided I would starve myself so I went into the forest away from possible humans, but after weeks of not having blood my will started to faint and then I came across a herd of deer and before I knew what I was doing a was drinking the blood of the animal closed to me, and my strength came back he smiled again and I knew there was another way of living without being a monster he finished a story. Carlisle you can never be a monster I said stopping in my tracks and pulled his hand so he would face me. He was surprised with my statement but looked pleased. How old are you actually I asked it sounds like you have travelled the world for a long time. He nodded I have I have been born in 1640 and was changed in 1663. I quickly counted the years in my head, in my human life, math hadn't been something I was really could at. But it seemed my vampire mind had no problem with it at all as I said 265 with a smile on my face. He nodded again. You never went back to your father I asked curiously while looking into his eyes. I looked at him from a distance a few times but never contacted him he answered truthfully. Must have been hard I exclaimed never having said goodbye. He sighted my father and I were never really eye to eye and since I had no extended family it wasn't very hard to move on with my new life he shrugged but Esme there is one question I like to ask you and his eyes changed a little, how is it that the young vibrant girl I met in the ER ten years ago come to commit suicide? I momentarily closed my eyes and when he saw the expression on my face he immediately said if you don't want to answer it I don't have to know. But for some reason I needed him to know so with some effort I forced myself to meet his eyes which had filled with sorrow. I started walking again but kept one of Carlisle's hand in a tight grip I would need the support but couldn't tell my story when looking him in the eyes. Right after my leg was healed my parents wanted me to marry I started and when they introduced Charles the son of a banker he seemed a good fit for them, I didn't want to marry him I could talk to him at first but I realized we would never be anything more than friends I kicked a stone out of my way and was a bit surprised when it damaged a large three but kept my mind on the story I was telling. But to make my parents happy I would agree to marry him, maybe I would feel more for him later on if we were married. But Charles changed when we got married, he loved me I sighted but when he realized I could never love him back like he wanted me too he started to be aggressive with me. On our wedding day he was the perfect gentleman in front of all the people but that night was the first time he forced himself on me I felt the strange burning sensation again in my chest but kept going, he started doing it again and again violating me in every way there was I stuttered raising my hand when Carlisle wanted to say something, my parents and family didn't want to hear any of it so I started excepting that this would be my life from now on, but then he went in the army and got sent away I was so relieved I sighted when the memory rushed back to me this time it were my eyes that wondered to the past but my feet kept going forwards and Carlisle followed without hesitation understanding it was easier for me.

But he came back and at first I thought things had changed he was so sweet and caring and maybe I thought maybe this could work for me I had a week smile but when Charles realized I still couldn't say I love you back to him he became the most angry he ever had been my chest tightened with the tears that wound's come out I went to my family again but their opinion was that I just shoot have a child with him and that would settle everything. When I realized I got pregnant it was time for me to get out of this situation I just coudn;t bring my baby in a world with a father like that so with the help of a friend I got out of time and went into hiding. But Charles found me after a while so I fled again I sighted and Carlisle squeezed my hand trying to comfort me and this gave the strength to finish my story. I lived in a nice little town where I would teach some children I was alone but happy with the baby coming soon. When my son Edward was born I was delighted with him, he was why I lived my reason why I kept going. I stopped dead in my tracks a the foggy memories pushed through the service and the pain rushed over me after a week he started coughing and the doctor came he said it was probably an ammonia and two hours after that my little boy died, it was that moment I decided that I could not go one anymore, I had left my family, lived in a town full of strangers and now I lost my baby I realized I was gripping Carlisle's hand pretty hard so I released the tension a bit not letting go entirely I walked over to that cliff and thought of my son and then I just jumped I ended my story and before I realized it Carlisle pulled me into a hug, I tensed up but not for long as I for the first time felt the comfort of a friend and I buried my head in his chest breathing in his scent.

We just stood there for a while as it was getting darker around us but we didn't matter I could see everything just as clear as if we were standing in the daylight. And after a few more moments he released me and looked into my eyes his hands still on my waist. Esme he said I am so sorry if I would have known that the sparkly girl I met was being abused I would have rescues you. Carlisle I said you don't have to be sorry for any of it how would you have known it were the worst years of my life but now thanks to you I don't ever have to think about it again I smiled weakly maybe but I smiled thank you for listening to my story I needed to hear it out loud for me to put it all together in some way. He returned my smile this time as he whispered always and pulled me toward the house maybe you want to take a shower now. I hadn't realized we were standing at the edge of the forest close to the house we had left so many hours ago apparently my feet had remembered the way. He opened the door and walked upstairs into a large bathroom and turned on the water if you want to take your clothes of you can put them in the hallway I will clean them up for you he said while handing me a towel. It was the first time I realized that I still was wearing the torn clothes with dried blood on it as the sweater Carlisle had given me was now also stained. I don't have any clothes for woman but if you're ok with it I could go to town and get you come he turned to me. Sure I said pulling the sweater over my head slowly not to rip it to pieces. Carlisle smiled at me and turned around to turn the water of again as he walked out of the bathroom if you finish early you can grab a shirt out of my closed in the bedroom he said while walking down the stairs I will be back soon. I thanked him again not even raising my voice I knew he would hear me. I quickly pulled of the bloody clothes I was wearing and tossed them in the hallway as Carlisle had said and stepped into the hot water in the bathtub relaxing a bit. The temperature of the water didn't seem to have any effect on my skin just as the temperature outside hadn't have an effect on me. I looked around me, the bathroom was large for just one person, it had white tiles across the walls and every now and then a little blue tile would be placed in a random pattern my eyes focused on the blue cabinet with a mirror on it and I realized I hadn't seen myself since I had woken up again my hand moved over my face and I didn't feel any bumbs or bruises nor could I find any on my body. I slipped under water to make sure my hair would be cleaned also and I realized I wasn't breathing. I could lay here under water for hours without having my lungs protest for the lack of oxygen. I stayed this way for ten more minutes before I pulled myself out of the bathtub and carefully taking the towel to rap itself around me. Although my best efforts I ripped the first one but it seemed Carlisle had thought of it as there lay a spare one ready, this time I succeeded and walked over to the cabinet to look at myself into the mirror. I gasped as I saw my reflection, part of me hadn't thought I would see one as I was a vampire now but those worries had quickly subsided. I stared at my face for a minute, my eyes were bright red and my skin was just as white as Carlisle's was, my hair was slightly darker because it was still wet but I could see it would fall round my face perfectly. I realized I needed a bigger mirror and I pushed open the door of the bathroom and started walking through the house. I didn't take long before I found the bedroom and as I walked in I spotted a long mirror on the closet. When I stood in front of it I dropped my towel which was wrapped around my body and starred at my reflection in amazement. In my human life I had no curves and my breast were almost nonexistent a fact Charles had complained about a lot the last months before I had left him but pregnancy had done my body good, I had curves now and my breast were bigger now, I didn't have any bruises and the scars that had been on my stomach were gone, as was the scar on my leg which Carlisle had mended. The only mark left on my body now seemed to be the place where Carlisle had bit me. I gently moved my hands across my body and saw the woman in the reflection doing the same this was really my I thought in surprise. But then I remembered that Carlisle would be coming back soon and it would be weird if I was standing in his bedroom, naked before a mirror so I returned back to reality and focused on finding some clothes. It didn't take me long to find a t-shirt that would fit and I gently put them on pleased that I didn't rip it. The shirt was big enough to cover me and I returned back to the bathroom and grabbed the panties I had saved and put them back on. I was curious how the rest of the house looked so I walked downstairs into a little hall.

At the left I could see there was a kitchen, but I decided to walk into the living room at the other door. In the middle of the room stood a black leather couch with a table in front of it. Carlisle apparently had turned on some lights when he rushed out of the house as the chandelier above the table created a nice warm light through the room. I walked past the table toward a row of bookshelf's and I ran my fingers across the backs to see what titles there where. On the other side of the square room was a large window that looked out into the forest we had just left, there was a little reading nook created, were you would be able to see everything in the house and what happened outside. I wondered if this was the side of the predator inside Carlisle to be aware of your surroundings. I returned back to the bookshelf and carefully took out one of my favorite books I had spotted earlier and returned to the large window taking a seat, from this position I could easily see Carlisle coming.

It didn't take him long before my now upgraded hearing could pick up on the footsteps coming closer to the door and before he had opened it I could smell his scent. He walked into the house and his eyes immediately met mine. I stood up realizing I was still wearing only my underwear and a shirt and if I could I would have blushed but when he spoke my embarrassment subsided. I didn't really know what you would like so I took different things he said with a smile what you don't like I will return and he handed me a bag. Thank you Carlisle I said and before I knew it I had given him a kiss on his cheek. He looked surprised but didn't move. I had seen his the brief look of surprise, or was is something else when I had stood up and walked over to him. But he recovered quickly and said you can take the room to the left I will make sure you get some nice things in their he said. You don't have to do that Carlisle I said you already had to get me clothes. It is my pleasure he said waving it away I am the one that turned you, so I should also make sure you are comfortable. Well thank you Carlisle as I pinched his cheek and started walking up the stairs to the room he had mentioned. Upstairs I opened the back and pulled out the different clothes. I was a bit surprised to find clothes similar to the ones I had always had worn and it didn't take me long to pick out a blue dress with some lace on it, but not wanting to damage it because it did fit really well when I had looked into the mirror. The dress complemented my new body so well that I realized that if I didn't want to risk damaging it I needed some help. So I walked downstairs to find Carlisle reading the book I had placed upon the table moments before. Uhm Carlisle I stared a bit nervous for the stupid request I was about to make can you help me with this dress, I don't want to ruin it as it fits really well so if you just could zip me up and I turned around showing him my back. Naturally he said as he stood behind me in a second and I could feel his gentle fingers tracing my back before he pulled the zipper up. I liked how his fingers felt on my skin but didn't want to embarrass myself so I turned around. So Carlisle do tell me do we need to hide in coffins when the sun comes up or is that just a rumor. He face broke into a big smile as he chuckled. His whole face had lit up when he smiled and he looked the more dashing as he already did but his answer pulled me back to him no we don't sleep in coffins he in fact we don't sleep at all. Never I said while I took a seat on the couch so what do you do at night. Carlisle thought of taking the seat beside me but settled in the chair closed to it. I study or I hunt at night when I am not working he answered. My curiosity was sparked how did you become a doctor I asked thinking of all the blood involved. He smiled again when I was studying different subjects I found medicine and it interested me, instead of hurting people with my gifts I could cure them his seriousness returning, it took me years before I trusted myself to be anywhere near patients though but now I don't even notice the blood anymore and my sense of smell actually helps me make a diagnosis. I sighted I hope one day I get as good at controlling my thirst like that when remembering the blood of the deer my throat flared up at once but not as bad as it had done at the beginning. Well I had two centuries of practice he said understandingly but I was surprised with your control today he said. I didn't understand and when he saw the look of surprise on my face he explained. We were running remember and when I stopped you stopped and you just snapped out of the first while the blood you were craving was not far away he looked with curiosity in his face at me what was it that pulled you out of it. You I blurred out looking away embarrassed I had still some difficulty at controlling what came out of my mouth I thought it was your scent actually it was stronger than the blood so I focused on it I realized a moment later meeting his eyes again. Carlisle leaned back in his chair but not before I again saw a look of content shoot across his face. Why is it special I asked not understanding his interest in the subject. It's just said while pressing his fingertips together I never heard of a newborn who could do that, it's a hard thing to learn to control he explained when your new most vampires are led by their instinct alone, really impulsive controlled by their bloodlust. I felt a rush of pride run through my body and let him think as I could see he was running things through his mind, but after a few minutes I started getting a bit awkward and shifted in my seat to get back his attention to the present when that didn't work I cleared my throat and asked so are the garlic and the stakes also folklore or should I really worry about walking into a church. It did the trick as I pulled him back into the present. We don't need to eat he answered as he placed his hand in his laps again and the stake could never hurt us, it wound's damage the skin. Why are no bruises I asked while looking over my body again but still finding nothing. The venom that transformed you healed them all he said the only scar you have left is where I bit you he gestured with his hand to my neck where he had earlier touched me. Are there more vampires out there I asked looking a bit nervous. No not her most of our kind live a nomadic life he said and they usually feed on humans and he looked a bit worried meeting my eyes. Do they have to kill them I asked. Yes otherwise there would be a lot of vampires being born every day and besides did you feel the lust when you first tasted the blood I nodded and would you have been able to stop I shook my head as I realized it must be the same for many vampires. But how did you stop when you bit me I suddenly asked. I have been around blood for many years now but I had to say it took me a little more effort than I had expected he said. Sorry I made you go through that before I could stop myself I reached out for his hand and placed it over his he didn't pull away. He gave me a smile thrust me you were worth it he chuckled as we talked on for the rest of the night.


	2. Revelation

2.

It had been three days since I had woken up into my new life, and I was adjusting well. I was getting used to my new strength and senses, as was I quite good a controlling my lust for blood as was proven by the latest hunt. We had gone to a nearby reservation filled with deer, but when we had started hunting I had smelled a whole new scent. A scent so tempting it had taken every ounce of strength not to let go of Carlisle's hand to go after it and hunt it down. Carlisle had smelt it to and had realized there where hunters out there, he had pulled my hand and had me pinned underneath his body before I could comprehend what was going on. I had snapped at him and tried to push him of but it was the concern in his eyes that had pulled me back to reality. He had explained that the smell was that of humans and that he couldn't let me go. I had been confused but was glad he had stopped me before I had taken off to hunt and probably kill them. When he had released me after a couple of minutes the look of concern had changed into curiosity, he had been surprised of my ability to cope so well with the bloodlust he was just surprised. My chest had swollen with pride as we resumed our hunt in a different reservation for the day.

Carlisle had resigned work so he could be with me all day. We needed to move anyway because the change that people would spot me. It had been a couple of days before Carlisle was satisfied to go on the move. I had felt quilt, it was because of me that he needed to move but he had merrily shrugged at my reaction, he had relocated anyway in the near further because of the not aging part of being a vampire. Carlisle owned a couple of houses across the country, some of them were centuries old. He would often go to one of his other houses and set up life there before moving on to a new location after a mere decade. It had been a cloudy morning as we had looked up at the big mansion for one last time as we moved on to another town. We were going to New Jersey were Carlisle owned a small house in the middle of the woods. We ran for hours in silence but I had kept a firm grasp of Carlisle's hand. We had grown closer together in the three days, as we didn't need to sleep or go to work we had hours to just talk. I had asked hundreds of questions about his live and other vampire family's and he had answered them with great delight glad at the interest I was showing in everything. As we ran my mind wandered to one of the conversations we had over Carlisle's early live as a vampire. I lived alone and in solitude he said with a sight, I couldn't have any relations with humans as I didn't thrust myself around them yet. I roomed the streets mostly at night and made sure I was well fed if I wandered into a town. He had frowned and a look of sadness had wandered over his face as he had thought of all the lonely months he had spent alone hidden away from society. I started to study different subjects during the night to occupy myself, and I found a passion for the human body. I realized how I could help cure people instead of hurting them and he had looked with determination as he had continued, so I could make my curse the miracle of a human to help safe them I redeemed myself a bit in my mind. Because I had all the time of the world to study and learn every technique there was I became a good doctor, and after years of practice I trusted myself enough to interact with the patients but always in the company of others making sure I didn't have a change to slip up he grimaced. But how were you ever able to expose yourself to all that blood I asked in awe. It took me years to be completely immune to its scent he had said with a light smile crossing his beautiful face as he had looked up to meet my eyes. You will get to that level to if you want to Esme he had said while touching my cheek I have never seen a newborn vampire handle the smell so well. If it had been possible I had blushed at this comment and I had taken the comfort of his hand against my face to steady myself again. The pain in his voice was sometimes audible as he spoke over the centuries he had lived, he had been all alone in the world afraid a co-worker would find out his darkest secret.

His soft voice had pulled me back into present time as I looked up into his eyes as he had stopped running they were standing bright and full of curiosity again as they had been all those times I had told him about my life what were u thinking of he asked you were so lost in thoughts. Just one of our conversations I replied. A good one I nice one I hope he chuckled as a smile crossed his face again as I nodded, I have only good talks with you I murmured softly as he turned away but I knew he had heart it. Now I looked ahead as Carlisle was walking to a large white house. Carlisle had walked up to the house and his hand moved over the doorway as he searched for the key, as he found it I joined him looking confused had he left the key there all these years. He turned his head and opened the door as he answered the question in my mind, I asked the housekeeper to leave it there he said as he gestured to me to join him in the house. I walked past the threshold and looked around me. The house was like the one we had just left a day ago nicely furnished with light colors. It looked like a family had lived here for all those years no dust particle to see as I walked towards the kitchen. Paintings were hanging from the walls and I admired them as I walked by. Carlisle had a good taste in art as I had found out the second day when he opened his art collection for me to see. Everything was open in the house and from the kitchen I could see the living room as it was just separated by a low wall. Carlisle had stood still watching me walk around the house in silence what do you think he asked as I looked up at him when I saw the piano standing in the corner. It's beautiful I said gesturing to the piano I didn't know you played. He smiled and walked over to me and took a seat behind the piano placing his hands over the keys a he played the most wonderful tune I had ever heart. Is there anything you are not good at I exclaimed looking at him as his hands kept moving. He rolled his eyes and chuckled as he patted on the bench to take the place next to him. Do you play he asked not missing a tune. I nodded my head a little my mom had shown me one or twice when we had Christmas dinners with the family, I never had the time to really learn though as one of my cousins crashed into it while dancing I chuckled at the memory that seemed so many lifetimes ago we had to take him to the hospital for a broken arm and ten stitches, and the piano was ready for the dump. One of his hand gently picked up mine and placed it over his hand while he kept playing and he softly neurite a little tune while playing. My hands followed his movements and after a little while of playing in silence he slid his hand from underneath mine placing them on top guiding them along, now it was me playing and he smiled when he looked at my face which had lit up in surprise when I played the tune without a problem. How did I learn this so quickly I asked in amazement. Your abilities are enhanced remember he said guiding my hands into a different tune you can learn things faster now. We kept playing until I noticed it got dark outside.

Carlisle I said after a little while remembering my family now as I stopped playing the piano what will happen to my family. He met my gaze with a bit of surprise on his face, how do you mean he asked. I placed my hands into my lap and looked away how will they know that I am really not coming back I said thinking of my mother, she had hurt me when she had sided with Charles when I told her what had happened but she was still my mother and remembering her when I had played the piano she had seemed so close for a moment. He sighed I left a note back in your house the night I changed you he said explaining how you couldn't live with yourself anymore and that you had left to never come back, I had written that you were pregnant and happy and that they didn't need to worry about you. I burning sensation started again in my chest but as always the tears wouldn't come. Carlisle understood my sentiment and he placed a finger under my chin softly turning my head to look at him I am sorry Esme he said softly wiping away an invisible tear. I know that I can never see them again and part of me is glad for it, as they never supported me with everything happening in my marriage I said with sorrow in my voice his fingers kept trailing along my jawline. But there are still your family Carlisle finished my sentence for me. I sighted again and rested my head in the crook of his shoulder and after a few more minutes I softly said your my family now Carlisle. He just hold me against his body as he said and you are mine.

It was the following morning as Carlisle came into the living room looking exited with his laptop in his hands. I looked up curious from the book I was reading. As he placed the laptop on the coffee table I could see the weather forecast on the screen. We needed to know what kind of weather it was when we went out to go hunting and until today it had been very cloudy for the week. He took a seat beside me placing his hand on my leg as he looked me in the eye looking rather excited about something you remember when I told you we needed to be careful with regards to the sunshine he said. I nodded in silence. Well it is sunny today and I thought it would be a good time to show you what would happen he said standing up and gently reaching for the book in my hand. I felt a rush of anxiety rush over he as I asked we don't burn in the sun do we. He chuckled again and shook he head while pulling me outside into a run.

When we were standing in the shadow of a big pine three he released my hand, ready he said. I once again nodded apprehensively Carlisle had been really vague when I had asked him what would happen with us when we stepped into the sunlight, but he had just said I needed to see it to believe it and had dropped the subject for the time being. And then Carlisle took a step backwards rolling up his sleeves in the meantime letting the sunshine glide over him. And then I understood what he had meant by you need to see it to believe it. The moment he had stepped away from the shadows his skin sparkled up into a million little diamonds glittering in the sunlight. I stood there in amazement realizing how amazing he looked as he grinned at my state of shock he grabbed my hand and pulled me forward into the sun myself. It felt nice the sun warming my pale skin and I looked at my hand for a moment admiring the effect it had. When I looked up at Carlisle again he had laid down in the middle of the clearing making himself comfortable in the grass. It took me two strides to reach him and settled myself next to him without looking away from his sparkling face, my hand reached up toward his face as I touched the sparkling skin he closed his eyes under my touch. I examined every inch of his face before he opened his eyes again, I hadn't realized how close we were to one another and when his hands started to move across my skin a new kind of warmth spread though my body having nothing to do with the sunlight. It was that moment I realized how lonely Carlisle must have been living alone all those years never being able to confide into a human for the fear of exposure. I lowered my hand and now followed the pattern of the veins of his bare forearm reaching up to his biceps and shoulders. His hands started to run across my back and I felt a different dynamic between us now and Carlisle seemed to notice it as well. His topaz colored eyes were slightly darker than they usually were as my hands started to run across his chest. He pulled me closer until I was practically sitting in his lap our faces a mere inch from each other. He looked at me with hesitance not certain how to proceed he looked for some kind of conformation. It was probably my newborn attitude and impulsiveness that let me to lean in and sparks of electricity ran through my body as my lips met his. Carlisle body tensed under my lips but the moment I pulled back thinking he didn't want this he pulled me closer his lips eagerly reaching for mine. He lifted me up onto his body as he lowered himself in the grass pulling me along. My lips were exploring his as his sweet taste filled my mouth, I realized that venom was leaking in my mouth and then I felt his tongue gently seeking for entrance.

Exited by his passion I parted my lips letting my tongue trace against the bottom of his lip and finally tasting his venom. His hand in the meantime were running across my body until he placed them in my coper curled hair. Mine had found their way into his blonde hair as I pulled him even closer to me our mouths moving in a tender rhythm against one another. I didn't know how long we were kissing as he slowly pulled away to look me in the eyes his hand resting on my back. I felt slightly embarrassed as I was lying on top of him, I quickly pushed myself onto the ground but Carlisle kept me close to his body. We were both panting both lost for words. But his eyes said it all as I finally met his gaze. That was I started as a burst of giggles rose from my throat making me shudder against his body and when I pulled myself together again I saw a new expression in his eyes, one I had never seen before. He looked utterly amazed just as I was and he still wasn't speaking. Carlisle that was quite something I finally said breaking his tension as a big smile moved over his face he looked happier as I had ever seen him. It was he said trailing his hand against my waistline I wasn't expecting that to happen but I am glad it did. I nodded relieved he didn't think it was a mistake. From the moment I recognized you laying in the morgue I felt something special about you but I couldn't quite place it he continued. Now I realized what the pull had been the last week it had been the warmth radiating from Carlisle every time he spoke or looked at me, I had thought it was me adjusting to my new life but now I realized that it was something completely different. All those times I would think about you I said nervously for the confession I was about to make, it was the one thing I had left out of all my stories I had told him, my eyes looking at his chest. I would think about you every time Charles would force me into his games I explained knowing he would be confused by my words, you were my escape the man of my dreams that was so nice to me that day in the ER, you were the first person that really listened to me without judging you were so caring I smiled vaguely at the memory that filled my mind I would lay in bed and think of the handsome doctor and where you would be by now with your wife and kids I said, you were the reminder that not all man were bad, that there were still gentleman out there so I was surprised when I opened my eyes for the first time that it was you my personal guardian angel standing beside me but not a day older than when I had met you I still didn't dare to look him in the eyes knowing how stupid this must sound.

But instead of him pulling away he pulled me up until his lips met mine again in a gentle kiss. I placed my head on his shoulder so I could look him in the eye. Esme why didn't you tell me before he said with a look of compassion at his face the first time I saw you I just knew there was something special about you and now I know what the feeling was he said with a sight of contempt as he relaxed I am in love with you he simply stated. My mind was racing did I just hear that correctly or was this my imagination making things up again but this time when I met his eyes I could see nothing more than love and care radiating from them, I stuttered still in amazement of how this afternoon was unfolding itself Carlisle I said after a couple of minutes feeling him tense up the tiniest bit as if he was fearful I would reject him I love you to and he just placed his head on top of mine pulling me against him I know he said. And I never felt more happy than at that precise moment laying against his body, feeling the sun on my skin and knowing I found the men of my dreams and realizing that we completely and irrevocably were in love with one another.


End file.
